part one of four

on tuesday, my boyfriend and i decided to go on a break. it's not a total break-up, tho it was at first. we're still together, and agreed to not even flirt with anyone else. it's more of a space thing. he said that he was feeling a little smothered. he and i had this agreement when we first started dating tat we'd be open with each other about anything that we felt was wrong in our relationship or if the other did somethign that the other did not like. well, i was keeping up my end of the deal, and i told him that if he had kept up his end of the deal better, that we might not have had this break happen. but, we agreed to work on this problem during this whole thing and we are making progress. in the past three days, we have both discussed our problems better, and in turn, i feel like we've gotten a bit closer doing so. since i was mad at him wednesday, and a bit still yesterday, i felt no need to hold back my opinions about some things and i feel much better for telling him what he needed to hear, not what he wanted to hear. this whole thing of "telling the truth more" has helped me get him to also talk to his dad more about things, instead of lying to him, just to get to go out of the house more. cuz, like my mom said (i cant belive im agreeing with her on something like this) you'll earn more trust than you can ever steal. that's why i dont lie to my mom about where im going. she knows that since im 19, she cant stop me from doing anything that i really want to do. she knows that there is drinking at most of my friend's parties, so she knows that ill either stay the night at my friends, or have my boyfriend drive,since he doesnt drink. as a kid, she'd talk to me about stuff instead of telling me not to do something just because she said not to. she told me the reasons why i should or should not do something (at least when i was old enough to understand). i dont think that my boyfriend's dad did that kind of thing with him. i think his dad is just one of those types of parents that uses the "because i said so, that's why" explination. that would never work for me. everytime one of my parents or even a teacher used that excuse on me, i'd keep asking them exactly why they made that certain decision untill they told me the exact reason. then, if i felt that the said reason wasnt justifiable, i'd dispute it with an actually rather logical arguement for a kid (i get this from my grandfather).



continued on next blog